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The „Lost” Decade Guide
Ever have those nights where you’re staring at the ceiling at 2:00 AM, wondering if you’re actually living your life or just… managing it?
Maybe you’re 24, scrolling through LinkedIn and feeling like you’re already five years behind everyone else. Maybe you’re 35, and while you’ve checked all the „adulting” boxes—the job, the partner, the apartment—it all feels a little hollow, like you’re wearing a costume that doesn’t quite fit. Or maybe you’re 45, and the „mid-life crisis” isn’t a cliché anymore; it’s a very real, very loud question: Is this really all there is?
If you feel lost, here’s the truth nobody tells you: You aren’t broken. We’ve been sold this lie that purpose is a destination—a single „Aha!” moment where the clouds part and you suddenly know your destiny. But the truth? Purpose isn’t a place you arrive at. It’s a practice. And more importantly, what „purpose” looks like changes as you change.
The strategy that works in your 20s will leave you feeling empty in your 40s. That’s why you feel stuck—you’re likely using an outdated map for the season of life you’re actually in.
In this post, we’re going to stop the „I’m behind” spiral and look at how to find your direction, whether you’re just starting out, stuck in the middle, or ready for a total reinvention.
Let’s find your „Why” again—without the existential dread.
The 20s Action Plan: From „Paralyzed” to „Pivot”
If you’re in your 20s and feel like you’re drifting, it’s usually because you’re waiting for a „sign” that hasn’t come yet. Here is how you stop waiting and start building:
1. Conduct a „Jealousy Audit”
We’re taught that jealousy is a bad thing. But in your 20s, jealousy is actually a compass. * The Task: Scroll through your social media. Who makes you feel a little „stings-to-be-me” jealous? Is it the friend traveling the world? The one who just started a tech firm? The one who’s a full-time artist?
- The Why: You aren’t jealous of the person; you’re jealous of the possibility they represent. If you’re jealous of a writer, you don’t actually want to be them—you want to be writing. Follow the sting.
2. Start „Micro-Experiments” (The 2-Week Rule)
Stop asking „What is my purpose?” and start asking „What is interesting for the next 14 days?”
- The Task: Pick one thing you’ve been curious about (coding, sourdough, podcasting, marathon running). Commit to doing it for just two weeks.
- The Why: At the end of 14 days, you’ll know if you actually like the work or if you just liked the idea of it. Purpose is found in the doing, not the thinking.
3. Focus on „Skill-Stacking,” Not Just Career-Climbing
In your 20s, your job might suck. That’s okay. Your purpose doesn’t have to be your paycheck yet.
- The Task: Look at your current boring job and find one high-value skill you can steal from them. Is it public speaking? Is it mastering Excel? Is it learning how to manage a difficult boss?
- The Why: Purpose often emerges when you become exceptionally good at something. Collect skills like trading cards; you’ll use them to build your „purpose” later.
4. The „Anti-Resume” List
Write down everything you know for a fact you don’t want to do.
- The Task: List every job, task, or environment that made you miserable.
- The Why: Sometimes finding your „Why” starts with a very clear „Hell No.” Every time you cross something off, the circle of where your purpose actually lives gets smaller and easier to find.
The „Vibe” for this section: > „Your 20s aren’t the time to be a specialist; they are the time to be a scientist. Throw the spaghetti at the wall. Some of it will stick, some will make a mess, but at least you’re finally in the kitchen.”
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